When you open Evolournal and start creating a journal entry or a to-do/duration, you’ll come across gentle prompts such as What little pieces of evidence today pointed to your evolving identity? and Who are you becoming through this? They’re meant to help you notice something we often overlook: it’s the small things—the daily actions and tiny choices—that quietly and steadily shape who you are becoming. Whenever you complete a journal entry or a to-do/duration tagged with some identity cards, those cards light up instantly, turning your action into an immediately visible signal of progress—a quick, satisfying moment of positive feedback that reinforces your growth.

The truth is, we’re constantly reshaping ourselves through small, repeated actions—the process never really stops. What happens is that we rarely register it while it’s unfolding. We only catch it in hindsight, with that sudden moment of recognition: So this is who I’ve become. But if we paid closer attention, we’d notice that there’s always a trail. The way we come to believe this is the kind of person I am usually grows out of the choices we make every day, the way we react to the things that happen to us, and the reflections that follow afterwards (and journaling remains one of the most powerful ways to review and reinterpret them). A lot of the time, we end up feeling as if life is shaping us by default—drifting into a version of ourselves we never exactly signed up for—simply because we skipped one tiny question at the moment it actually mattered: Right now, in this situation, who do you choose to be?

But let’s be honest: that question is not designed for every moment. Some days we drag ourselves home after a long battle with reality, and all we want is to become one with the sofa, open a bag of chips, and let the most brain-numbing show wash over us. If some spooky inner voice floated in right then with, “Who are you choosing to be at this moment?” the only reasonable response would be, “I’m choosing to survive. Try again tomorrow.”

And that’s completely fine. Running a 24/7 self-philosophy hotline in your head is a great way to lose your mind. The real skill is knowing when the question matters—and knowing when the only identity you’re choosing is temporarily offline. When a decision truly matters—the kind that can shape your next few months or even years—that’s exactly when the question becomes essential: In this moment, facing this, who do you choose to be?

But even after making that choice, life doesn't fast-forward you to the part where you’re celebrating the payoff as if you could simply drag a progress bar to the moment of success. You still have to walk it out step by step: act, reflect, iterate. Along the way, you can keep asking yourself, “Right now, who do you choose to be?” Sometimes that steady, ongoing self-ask keeps you aligned with the direction you chose and gives you the grit to push through the difficult stretches. Other times, the more you ask, the more you feel an uneasy distance from the goal you first committed to—a signal to pause and reconsider: Is this truly what I want? Did this goal come from my own desire, or from pressure around me? What do I genuinely love? What am I really drawn toward? By asking and answering this question continuously, you gradually become more aware of who you truly want to be and who you are actually becoming—and that awareness helps you steadily align the two, until you’re living as the person you genuinely admire.

Naturally, living as your ideal self isn’t something that comes easily. Along the way, you’ll encounter challenges, wrestle with doubts, and sometimes feel uncertain about how to make real progress. This raises two key questions: first, how do you set a standard for your ideal self in a way that actually allows you to take actionable steps toward your goals; and second, once that ideal is defined, how do you stay committed when obstacles arise?

In Evolournal, your ideal self takes the form of an identity card—one of the app's core design features. By tagging each journal entry or to-do/duration with some identity cards, you make the process of becoming your ideal self visible. The way you define the standards for your ideal self often determines how easily those standards can be translated into action. The following suggestions are a few of my thoughts on how to set up ideal self standards that are more practical and actionable.

1. Make your standards concrete and specific, not vague or abstract

If the standards you set for your ideal self are too vague—for example, successful, happy, or confident—it can be hard to know where to start. You might find yourself resorting to superficial or performative actions just to validate that self-image, which often ends in exhaustion and frustration.

If your current idea of your ideal self feels fuzzy, I suggest digging deeper and breaking these standards down into more specific, actionable details. Ask yourself questions like: What exactly does this quality mean? Why do I want to develop it? What would it feel like to embody it? How would I act and relate to others in that state? Who do I know who embodies this quality? What have they done or said that makes me recognize it in them and inspires me to want it? If you want to develop this quality, what actions would you need to take, or what words would you need to speak? And by taking those actions or saying those words, what other qualities might you cultivate, and what experiences might you gain along the way?

You can explore this process on your own, or with a trusted family member, friend, or even AI. Step by step, this deep reflection can bring you closer to the essence of the person you truly aspire to become.

For example, if your first draft standard was successful, ask yourself: What does success really mean to me? What draws me to it? Why do I want it? Different people will have different answers. Some might seek recognition or attention (perhaps from a strict parent who never praised them), some might seek material abundance, and others might want to impact and improve the lives of others in their own way. How each person defines success will naturally shape the path, qualities, and actions required to achieve it.

Or, if your goal is to become confident, ask yourself: How do I define confidence? When I am truly confident, what would my mindset and state be? How would I treat the people and situations around me? Who do I know that embodies the confidence I aspire to have? What makes me perceive them as confident? Where does their confidence come from? You can also reverse the question: why do I currently lack confidence? Have you yet to recognize your own unique strengths, spark, and value? Imagine the actions that would make you genuinely admire yourself, trust yourself, and feel proud of yourself.

These kinds of questions and reflections can help you pinpoint standards for your ideal self that are both accurate and actionable. Ultimately, the best standards are those you can put into practice immediately: when you clearly know the next steps you can take to move closer to this better version of yourself, your standards are well-defined and ready to guide action.

2. Base your standards on internal qualities, not external judgments

External judgments include labels like excellent, successful, or leader, whereas internal qualities refer to things like pursuing and sticking to your passions, solving problems instead of blaming circumstances, using your skills and resources to serve others, or taking initiative and responsibility.

External judgments tend to reflect milestone-type outcomes. They are not only harder to translate into daily action, but they can also create pressure and frustration. When you haven’t yet reached a certain milestone, it can feel like you’re not qualified to activate that identity card, which easily leads to self-doubt or self-criticism. Such self-doubt and criticism do nothing to help you move closer to your goals.

Internal qualities, on the other hand, reflect a continuous state and provide actionable reference points that can be reinforced through everyday behavior. They subtly and steadily propel you forward. For example, if your goal is to become a leader, you might not be able to activate that identity card until you actually hold a leadership position. But if your standard shifts to being someone who takes initiative and responsibility or uses their skills and resources to serve others, you can start activating these identity cards in your daily interactions with others—even if you haven’t yet become a leader. These small moments of activation gradually move you toward the direction you aspire to, laying the groundwork for becoming a trustworthy leader someday.

Often, reaching a position or level defined by external standards requires opportunities beyond our control. What we can do is prepare ourselves to be ready for those opportunities—by cultivating the internal qualities that match the level we aim to achieve.

3. Base your standards on sustainable causes in the process of achieving your goals, rather than on final outcomes

Regularly observing others’ strengths and potential is an example of a sustainable cause, while being good at selecting the right partners is a momentary outcome. Similarly, we find that outcome-oriented qualities are harder to translate into daily action, whereas process-oriented, state-based standards are much easier to apply in everyday life. Following the self-inquiry from principle one, as we continuously ask ourselves who we want to become and how to become that version of ourselves, we gradually uncover the deeper qualities and abilities beneath surface behaviors. Using these as our standards allows us to establish stronger roots and grow steadily upward.

If you feel stuck or discouraged when facing the identity cards you've created, take a moment to consider whether it's because these cards are too abstract or hard to put into action, leaving you without a clear path forward and spinning in place. When we're eager to become a better version of ourselves but don't know where to start, the gap between our current self and that ideal can naturally heighten anxiety and frustration. But that's okay — everyone experiences doubt and discouragement on the journey to becoming their best self. It's fine to feel it; when you're mentally and physically drained, give yourself a hug and get some real rest. When you wake up the next day, you can slowly break down your goals, dig into the essence behind them, and make them more actionable and achievable. Sometimes, what we really need to focus on is the current trajectory rather than the current state. Long after, when you finally reach that seemingly distant goal and look back, you may realize that the moments that set you apart from others who got lost were precisely the times when you adjusted the rudder, corrected your course, and kept moving forward against the wind.

Once you've defined the standards and direction for your ideal self, how do you stay committed along the way? In the next article, we'll explore how to maintain your path and keep going when obstacles arise, even after you've established your ideal self.